Why Slowing Down Was the Best Thing I Never Planned
I'm still finding my way back to normal after the sale of my parents' home although honestly, what even is normal anymore?
My mom passed away in 2010, which somehow doesn't feel that long ago. My dad passed away in 2025, and selling the home (2026) where they built their life and where so many of my memories were made was another goodbye I wasn't quite ready for. Then, in late May, my father-in-law passed away, and our focus shifted to making sure my mother-in-law was going to be okay.
Needless to say, life happened. And my flowers had to wait.
If you know me, you know that's saying something.
Gardening has always been one of my happy places. It's where I think. It's where I remember. It's where I feel closest to my mom. Every year I look forward to filling the yard with petunias, million bells, snapdragons, and just about anything else that brings a little color and happiness.
Normally, I would have emptied every flower pot and replanted them long before June. This year, I didn't get started until the second week of June.
And honestly... I'm really glad I was late.
Sometimes Life Has Other Plans
Before I bought a single flower, I walked around the yard to see what needed to be cleaned up. That's when I noticed something that completely stopped me in my tracks.
There were already flowers growing in some of my pots. Not weeds - Flowers. Beautiful petunias, million bells and snapdragons.
At first, I actually laughed because my first thought was, "Wait... I didn't plant those."
Apparently, my flower pots had their own plans while I was busy trying to keep life together.
I plant these flowers every year, but they're considered annuals. Those tiny little seeds hung around, waited their turn, and surprised me with some of the prettiest flowers in the yard.
And boy, did they come back beautifully.
The other evening, before heading inside for the night, I was walking around the yard again, taking it all in. I couldn't stop looking at those flowers. The colors were incredible - bright pinks, purples, yellows and orange - and every time I looked at them, they made me smile.
Then it hit me.
If I had done what I normally do every spring - emptied those pots and started fresh - I never would have seen them. I would have unknowingly thrown away something beautiful before it ever had the chance to bloom. That thought stayed with me.
The Lesson I Didn't Know I Needed
It made me think about how often we rush through life because we’re trying to stay on schedule or keep moving forward. Sometimes we assume something has run its course before giving it the chance to surprise us, and in the process, we miss what has been quietly growing right in front of us.
Looking back, maybe being late this year wasn’t such a bad thing after all. Life forced me to slow down, and because I did, I noticed something I would have completely missed. Maybe slowing down isn’t always a setback. Sometimes it’s exactly what we need.
When Grief Changes the Way You See the World
Grief has a funny way of changing your perspective.
Things you never noticed before suddenly mean everything.
Or, in my case... A flower growing where I never expected it.
Petunias were always one of my mom's favorite flowers to plant every summer. So when I saw those blooms waiting for me, I didn't think it was just a coincidence. I believe it was a sign. Some people may see flowers that simply reseeded themselves.
Maybe they did.
I choose to believe my mom had something to do with it. A quiet reminder that she's never really far away. A moment of comfort I didn't even realize I needed.
One of the things grief has taught me is that signs don't have to make sense to everyone else. They only have to mean something to the person receiving them.
Beautiful Things Still Grow
Those little surprise flowers didn’t erase my grief, make this year any easier, or change everything that happened. But they did remind me that even after loss, beautiful things can still grow.
Maybe that was the lesson I needed all along. Not everything has to happen on our timeline, and not everything has to be perfect. Sometimes life slows us down because there’s something we’re meant to notice.
If I had rushed, I would have emptied those flower pots and thrown away the very thing that now makes me smile every time I walk by.
And I can't help but wonder... How many beautiful things do we miss because we're too busy trying to stay on schedule?
One Last Thought
Those surprise flowers are still blooming in my yard, and every evening before I head inside, I stop to admire them. They remind me of my mom, they remind me to slow down, and they remind me that sometimes the best things in life are the ones we never planned.
So if life feels a little heavy or off schedule right now, give yourself some grace. Take a walk, look around, and leave a little room for the unexpected. You never know what beautiful thing might already be growing, just waiting for you to notice it.
I'd love to hear from you.
Have you ever experienced something that felt like a sign from someone you love? Maybe it was a flower, a bird, a butterfly, something you found at home, or simply a moment that brought you comfort when you needed it most.
Share your story in the comments. I'd love to read it.
